1) The biggest change i would do, is merge my two paragraphs of repetition into one, and then write a paragraph on the line, "He also wants the audience to develop a sense of urgency and importance by connecting through this constant use of repetition."
2) In my simile paragraph, I will do more analysis focused around imagery.
3) Replace a couple of words that I used in my essay, for example the word "coerce" sounds kinda negative and would better be replaced with convinced.
My favorite move is: WARRIOR (2011). period. watch it.
Tuesday, February 21, 2012
Monday, February 20, 2012
O thou art my love,
I wish thou wert here with me
but for thine safety run thy away from me,
lest thy be speedily dragged down to hell with me,
Dwight's constant bickering and enormous ego
would quickly crumble Lucifer's domain,
O that I might be with thine, our love eternal
For thou hath the face of an angel, beauty shining so brightly
may hast with thy here, we might end Schrute's reign of terror
If thou wert here with me, we might place his stapler in jello,
pop his fitness ball, or relocate his desk.
Surely he cannot withstand our love.
Wheresoe'er thou goest, I wilt follow
neither man nor devil can stop me.
People shall tremble at the magnitude of our love,
Bards will write a song about what we share.
O that I might be with thee.
Thine husband and lover,
Jim Halpert
but for thine safety run thy away from me,
lest thy be speedily dragged down to hell with me,
Dwight's constant bickering and enormous ego
would quickly crumble Lucifer's domain,
O that I might be with thine, our love eternal
For thou hath the face of an angel, beauty shining so brightly
may hast with thy here, we might end Schrute's reign of terror
If thou wert here with me, we might place his stapler in jello,
pop his fitness ball, or relocate his desk.
Surely he cannot withstand our love.
Wheresoe'er thou goest, I wilt follow
neither man nor devil can stop me.
People shall tremble at the magnitude of our love,
Bards will write a song about what we share.
O that I might be with thee.
Thine husband and lover,
Jim Halpert
Monday, February 13, 2012
Love similes and metaphors
1)The guy's dance for his special someone had the viscosity of peanut butter.
2) His heart felt like the dust on the floor getting swept into the trash can.
3) After he broke up with her, she felt like a wet rag getting squeezed.
4) His emotions went from being on fire to like a fire getting snuffed out by a fire extinguisher.
5) The girl thought her sweethearts valentine looked like a kinder-gardener had been scribbling.
Monday, February 6, 2012
Here we go
Dear Judge Harper,
I am addressing you because of a speeding ticket on February 7th, 2012. This is my fourth speeding ticket, and my driver's license has been taken away. I am truly sorry for breaking the law and take full responsibility for my actions. I promise to obey the law in the future. I am willing to go to defensive driving school. I need my drivers license in order to maintain my current work and school schedule. Please take my proposal into consideration.
Sincerely
Kenny Nelson
Dear Mom,
Hey Mom, just wanted to say hi. So pretty much I have been working and studying. College is pretty tough. Anyways, I might have gotten a fourth speeding ticket, and my drivers license might be on probation. Did I mention I love you? Cause I do. So how are things going back home? I hope things are going well!
Love,
Kenny
Fellow Classmates,
Everyone here speeds right? I mean who wouldn't, when your brother finally lets you drive his 450 horsepower Dodge Viper. That beauty is incredibly fast, its hard not to speed! Because of that I got a speeding ticket, which lead to my drivers license being taken away... that's a little harsh, don't you think? Everyone at one point has broken the law, my drivers license doesn't need to be suspended for speeding... I'm no felon or criminal, I have lived a good life, and plan on continuing to obey the law. Help me out here.
Kenny Nelson
I am addressing you because of a speeding ticket on February 7th, 2012. This is my fourth speeding ticket, and my driver's license has been taken away. I am truly sorry for breaking the law and take full responsibility for my actions. I promise to obey the law in the future. I am willing to go to defensive driving school. I need my drivers license in order to maintain my current work and school schedule. Please take my proposal into consideration.
Sincerely
Kenny Nelson
Dear Mom,
Hey Mom, just wanted to say hi. So pretty much I have been working and studying. College is pretty tough. Anyways, I might have gotten a fourth speeding ticket, and my drivers license might be on probation. Did I mention I love you? Cause I do. So how are things going back home? I hope things are going well!
Love,
Kenny
Fellow Classmates,
Everyone here speeds right? I mean who wouldn't, when your brother finally lets you drive his 450 horsepower Dodge Viper. That beauty is incredibly fast, its hard not to speed! Because of that I got a speeding ticket, which lead to my drivers license being taken away... that's a little harsh, don't you think? Everyone at one point has broken the law, my drivers license doesn't need to be suspended for speeding... I'm no felon or criminal, I have lived a good life, and plan on continuing to obey the law. Help me out here.
Kenny Nelson
Saturday, February 4, 2012
Found Poetry
The only hope you have is to accept the fact that you're already dead. The sooner you accept that, the sooner you'll be able to function as a soldier is supposed to function: without mercy, without compassion, without remorse. All war depends upon it.
The only hope you have
is to accept the fact that you're already dead.
The sooner you accept that,
the sooner you'll be able to function
as a soldier is supposed to function:
without mercy,
without compassion,
without remorse.
All war depends upon it.
Monday, January 30, 2012
Rhetorical Analysis; critical reading questions
I have chosen to reread and go over the article by Gideon Burton, "Dear Students: Don't Let College Unplug Your Future."
The Author's intent is to motivate students to be creative about their education. To think outside the box. Burton talks about how college professors are falling behind the digital era. Students need to use these new media tools to help better themselves. Burton's big point is not to focus on the grades, or the diploma, and that college is not the only option. He says that its not the diploma that speaks for you, its your work and actions that reveals who you are. He tries to motivate the students to get more involved through the uses of new media
Gideon Burton uses many different tools and strategies to help his article. First of all he uses ethos, pathos, and logos through italics and capital phrases throughout the article, so that they standout, and connect with the reader. He uses imagery throughout the article. For example when he says, "This alternative to college credentials is a huge as the Stay Puft marshmallow man from Ghostbusters and he's towering over the skyline right where town meets gown: online identity." This is clearly an example of imagery. He uses metaphors as well, he relates transcripts, as your lifestream: blogs, social networks, and creative work.
The audiences reaction I feel is mixed. I agree that college can be quite useless, especially in this day and age. Students who go to big schools like Harvard, Yale, etc, and pay huge amounts of money, end up with debts of 200,000 plus by the time they graduate. They try to find a job, with a starting salary of 60,000 plus, and can only find a job with a starting salary of 30,000. They simply can not pay off their debts. We chose to go to school to become specialized in a certain area, so that they can get a job. That is why BYU is such a great place, because it has a high reputation and a low tuition rate, so students that need to learn so that they can get a job, will be able to educate themselves at a low cost.
Gideon Burton is a college professor at Brigham Young University. He believes everyone should have strong political views, but be respectful at the same time. He mainly teaches English 382. He has been a member of the English Department since 1994, specializes in Renaissance literature, the history of rhetoric and Mormon literature and criticism. He published the article January 6, 2009.
The Author's intent is to motivate students to be creative about their education. To think outside the box. Burton talks about how college professors are falling behind the digital era. Students need to use these new media tools to help better themselves. Burton's big point is not to focus on the grades, or the diploma, and that college is not the only option. He says that its not the diploma that speaks for you, its your work and actions that reveals who you are. He tries to motivate the students to get more involved through the uses of new media
Gideon Burton uses many different tools and strategies to help his article. First of all he uses ethos, pathos, and logos through italics and capital phrases throughout the article, so that they standout, and connect with the reader. He uses imagery throughout the article. For example when he says, "This alternative to college credentials is a huge as the Stay Puft marshmallow man from Ghostbusters and he's towering over the skyline right where town meets gown: online identity." This is clearly an example of imagery. He uses metaphors as well, he relates transcripts, as your lifestream: blogs, social networks, and creative work.
The audiences reaction I feel is mixed. I agree that college can be quite useless, especially in this day and age. Students who go to big schools like Harvard, Yale, etc, and pay huge amounts of money, end up with debts of 200,000 plus by the time they graduate. They try to find a job, with a starting salary of 60,000 plus, and can only find a job with a starting salary of 30,000. They simply can not pay off their debts. We chose to go to school to become specialized in a certain area, so that they can get a job. That is why BYU is such a great place, because it has a high reputation and a low tuition rate, so students that need to learn so that they can get a job, will be able to educate themselves at a low cost.
Gideon Burton is a college professor at Brigham Young University. He believes everyone should have strong political views, but be respectful at the same time. He mainly teaches English 382. He has been a member of the English Department since 1994, specializes in Renaissance literature, the history of rhetoric and Mormon literature and criticism. He published the article January 6, 2009.
Monday, January 23, 2012
Op Ed grammar errors...
Op Ed grammar errors...
1) "A good example of this is the 2012 Republican Candidate Mitt Romney."
Needs comma
"A good example of this is the 2012 Republican Candidate, Mitt Romney."
2) "Some of you might be confused when i talk about generally aware and politically aware."
Sentence structure was confusing
"Some of you might be confused when i talk about being general awareness versus political awareness."
3) "However, the President's job goes far beyond church related issues."
Incorrect capitalization.
"However, the president's job goes far beyond church related issues."
4) "The easiest way to find the best presidential candidate is to become politically aware of their beliefs, and then make an educated decision, not making a decision just because a candidate seems to have the same set of values or beliefs."
Comma splice
"The easiest way to find the best presidential candidate is to become politically aware of their beliefs, and then make an educated decision. It is important to not make a decision just because a candidate seems to have the same set of values or beliefs."
5) "Become politically aware and active, and start contributing today, the world needs you."
Comma splice
"Become politically aware and active, and start contributing today. The world needs you."
I have a couple opinions about peer reviews. The first is the requirement of five comments per page. I feel like this is kind of like busy work, and distracts from the real purpose of peer reviewing. To me it feels like we are getting forced to find something. This makes it hard sometimes, because people are at different writing levels, and for some one peer reviewing an expert at writing, they are going to end up writing a lot of compliments. Its going to be hard for them to find something to actually improve the paper.
I do like peer reviews though because sometimes when you are writing you get stuck up in your own world, and do not view something as others do. Peer reviewing offers the chance for others to say, "hey did you forget about this?" or ,"what about this point of view?" I don't know if this is making any sense.. What I mean is it easy to write from your point of view, but completely forgot about other points of view, which could end up alienating people.
Overall I think that it is good to have your paper peer reviewed by one other classmate. In the end I think it is most important to get it review by the teacher. The teacher is the one that grades, and knows what you need in your paper to get a good grade.
1) "A good example of this is the 2012 Republican Candidate Mitt Romney."
Needs comma
"A good example of this is the 2012 Republican Candidate, Mitt Romney."
2) "Some of you might be confused when i talk about generally aware and politically aware."
Sentence structure was confusing
"Some of you might be confused when i talk about being general awareness versus political awareness."
3) "However, the President's job goes far beyond church related issues."
Incorrect capitalization.
"However, the president's job goes far beyond church related issues."
4) "The easiest way to find the best presidential candidate is to become politically aware of their beliefs, and then make an educated decision, not making a decision just because a candidate seems to have the same set of values or beliefs."
Comma splice
"The easiest way to find the best presidential candidate is to become politically aware of their beliefs, and then make an educated decision. It is important to not make a decision just because a candidate seems to have the same set of values or beliefs."
5) "Become politically aware and active, and start contributing today, the world needs you."
Comma splice
"Become politically aware and active, and start contributing today. The world needs you."
I have a couple opinions about peer reviews. The first is the requirement of five comments per page. I feel like this is kind of like busy work, and distracts from the real purpose of peer reviewing. To me it feels like we are getting forced to find something. This makes it hard sometimes, because people are at different writing levels, and for some one peer reviewing an expert at writing, they are going to end up writing a lot of compliments. Its going to be hard for them to find something to actually improve the paper.
I do like peer reviews though because sometimes when you are writing you get stuck up in your own world, and do not view something as others do. Peer reviewing offers the chance for others to say, "hey did you forget about this?" or ,"what about this point of view?" I don't know if this is making any sense.. What I mean is it easy to write from your point of view, but completely forgot about other points of view, which could end up alienating people.
Overall I think that it is good to have your paper peer reviewed by one other classmate. In the end I think it is most important to get it review by the teacher. The teacher is the one that grades, and knows what you need in your paper to get a good grade.
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